Thursday, September 20, 2007

Headline: Cell Phone Causes Woman to Rob Banks!


It was captivating watching The Telephone Bank Robber on television, wasn’t it? The police say they have a big suspicion that it may have been or could have been Candice Rose Martenize just because she has a resemblance to the zillion pictures we all saw on television.


The police caught Innocent Until Proven Guilty Candice Rose Martenize in a North Virginia suburb. I think that “Martenize” is an alias. Out here in Idaho we spell it “Martinez, Martinis,” and some non-teetotalers after 4 P.M., “martini.”


I’ve made a scientific study of the case.


We learn at: http://cellphones.about.com/b/a/026565.htm


"September 15, 2003 “New cell phone radiation danger: bloody brain damage…


"According to a British scientist, cell phones can ‘cause proteins to leak across the blood-brain barrier’, which could lead to early senility. The scientist, quoted by The Independent, says the long-term effects are not proven, and that damage could repair itself, but he also explains that people that used to become senile around 60 could now do so in their 30s due to intense exposure to radiation.’"


Radiation is not good for your brain, especially if you are a rat!


We learn at: http://cellphones.about.com/b/a/056798.htm


"January 12, 2004 Rats get visible brain damage from cell phone radiation


"The February issue of Popular Science has a short piece about a Swedish study involving rats exposed to cell phone radiation. A classic approach, but this time brain damage is visible and it's freaky! A picture of a rat brain after cell phone exposure shows many dark spots, apparently leaked blood vesels (vessels) and damaged neurons. Of course, the industry has been quick to dismiss the study, but other scientists are gearing up to try and replicate these findings. So far, the most prevalent scientific opinion on cell phone radiation is essentially that it is too weak to damage the human brain…"


You got it?


Cell phones can fry your brain, especially if you are a rat.


Our Innocent Until Proven Guilty Candice Rose Martenize or “Martinez, Martinis,” or “martini” is most likely completely innocent.


If cell phones can cause early senility, they can change your love-abiding personality to that of a money-hungry cell-phone-talking bank robber.


That’s my theory and I’m sticking to it.


Why would such a Innocent Until Proven Guilty lovely young creature ever want to do anything other than to love and benefit her fellow human beings, especially old men in Idaho?


Innocent Until Proven Guilty didn’t do it on purpose!


For those of you who think the Phone Bandit was just dumb, here is a story:


"Robbed the Post Office November 17th, 2005.


"A man moved to the small rural community I live in and rented a box at the local Post Office. In order to rent the box he had to show picture ID and give his physical address and phone number. He lived in line sight of the post office just off the main road. Two days later he robbed the Post Office at gun point, the local police and postal inspectors merely had to walk across the street to arrest him at his home. His mail is now being forwarded to a federal correctional facility for the next several years." (http://www.dumbcrooks.com/)


They’ve got other dumb crook stories there at http://www.dumbcrooks.com/.


Have fun!


Copyright©John T. Jones, Ph.D.2005








John T. Jones, Ph.D. (tjbooks@hotmail.com)is a retired R&D engineer and VP of a Fortune 500 company. He is author of detective & western novels, nonfiction (business, scientific, engineering), poetry, etc. Former editor of international trade magazine. Jones is Executive Representative of International Wealth Success.


More info: http://www.tjbooks.com


Business web site: http://www.bookfindhelp.com (IWS wealth-success books and kits and business newsletters / TopFlight flagpoles)

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